Aedan laid awake in his bed, staring at the ceiling of the empty room. He was still getting used to the new house and its size, but he was quickly warming up to it. He remained there for a while, pensive as he went through his thoughts. Things that were spoken of the previous night, along with all that came with it. He took comfort in it all as he smiled.
His mind moved back even further, then, reflecting on things as he often did. His arrival on Viscara some months back, those he’d met along the way, the bonds he made, the struggles he encountered, and so on. He had grown far more than he had ever expected in only the few months since he had arrived. How he had gone from a smartass, wookiee-raised human with a faulty cybernetic eye, into someone legitimately able to call themselves a Jedi. He was still without a proper master, but he continued to take solace in the teachings he recieved from his mentor.
He let out a sigh as he finally decided to get up from his bed to get dressed. He wandered out to the rather empty house, looking about at the lack of furnishing and proper lighting. For the moment, however, he ignored the emptiness of it all and just went to take a seat in the middle of the floor to meditate. His mind then continued to reflect on the past as he would continue to move towards the future.
He had gone through a great deal to get where he is. Suffering through a lot of inner conflict and struggle with his emotions as he grasped everything he needed. The thoughts of having been so obsessed in certain things, his pride in more things than one, and his overall stubbornness. The points where he questioned so much about himself, lost his way for a while, before then finding it once more. But never alone in any of it. He had overcome much of his own self and continued to do so, for he knew no one ever truly masters their own self. All he could do was continue to better himself through everything. Learning from past failures to push forward.
But still, it wasn’t anything he could do alone. He was the only one who could make his own decisions, but without those he carried bonds with, he would’ve likely fallen apart long ago. It was then he thought of his own guiding light. The brightest light that guided him through it all, and continued to do so.
It was then that his mind moved to reflect on what he had learned about the Force and the Code as a whole.
“The Jedi are still people, after all. Despite what many would think, they are not without emotion, chaos, or otherwise. But despite the literal meaning of the Code, harmony and balance was what truly made the Jedi what they are. Emotion could still exist while remaining at peace, through proper control and not letting it influence you when needed. Brief moments of ignorance could exist, so long as it becomes balanced by learning from the mistakes and gaining the knowledge for it. Passion could exist in moderation while remaining calm and serene through control. Chaos will always exist as a Jedi must always face what makes them human, but can still bring this into balance by bringing harmony through what they feel and what they do. And at the end of it all, everyone dies, but it’s only our bodies that do. Death is only the beginning of a much larger adventure, as we become one with the Force.”
He knew, however, that he could fully understand all of this, and say it over and over, but it still meant nothing without proper action on it. He knew he had to continue his training, moving further into the future as he continued to better himself and gain control. He still had much to learn, and that would never end. But he was determined in all of it, for more reasons than one. But he was not perfect, nor would he ever be perfect.
His mind wandered yet again to the brightest light in the starlit sky among his thoughts. He then opened his eyes calmly and smiled.